A striking quote from Christopher Hitchens’ piece:

Iran and its citizens are considered by the Shiite theocracy to be the private property of the anointed mullahs. This totalitarian idea was originally based on a piece of religious quackery promulgated by the late Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomeini and known as velayat-e faqui. Under the terms of this edict—which originally placed the clerics in charge of the lives and property of orphans, the indigent, and the insane—the entire population is now declared to be a childlike ward of the black-robed state. Thus any voting exercise is, by definition, over before it has begun, because the all-powerful Islamic Guardian Council determines well in advance who may or may not “run.”

This is the core of the theocracy – we are all God’s children, but someone has to play Jack Merridew. “Nanny state” is usual used to criticize far less authoritarian powers – the ban on trans fat, say, or politically correct priggishness. But the principle, whether it is founded in Islamic theology or utilitarianism, is the same: we know better than you do.

There is a strong case to be made for “nannying” children – this is called parenting. There is a strong, but weaker, case to be made for nannying the indigent. Yet the mission creeps, and each class becomes more and more in need of a helping hand from Papa State.

So what does one do with an impudent child? Well:

It’s easy to catch a Byronian pan-Persian fervor here, as Andrew Sullivan has (read him if you aren’t already), but this story is far from black and white. Juan Cole’s considerations aside, it’s not at all impossible that Ahmadinejad may, in fact, have won the election. As this piece puts it:

The election results in Iran may reflect the will of the Iranian people. Many experts are claiming that the margin of victory of incumbent President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad was the result of fraud or manipulation, but our nationwide public opinion survey of Iranians three weeks before the vote showed Ahmadinejad leading by a more than 2 to 1 margin – greater than his actual apparent margin of victory in Friday’s election.

. . .

The breadth of Ahmadinejad’s support was apparent in our pre-election survey. During the campaign, for instance, Mousavi emphasised his identity as an Azeri, the second-largest ethnic group in Iran after Persians, to woo Azeri voters. Our survey indicated, though, that Azeris favoured Ahmadinejad by 2 to 1 over Mousavi.

Much commentary has portrayed Iranian youth and the internet as harbingers of change in this election. But our poll found that only a third of Iranians even have access to the internet, while 18-to-24-year-olds comprised the strongest voting bloc for Ahmadinejad of all age groups.

. . .

The fact may simply be that the re-election of President Ahmadinejad is what the Iranian people wanted.

Here democracy reaches its limit. Assuming that democracy is the highest virtue, then Moussavi’s movement is an anti-democratic one. Warmongers for democracy should not only refuse Moussavi any direct support, but should in fact support Ahmadinejad until his vote tally falls below 50 percent (if, in fact, it ever does). To support Moussavi is to subvert the democratic will of those who voted for Ahmadinejad.

Yet there are higher principles than “democracy,” for democracy is simply a means that has generally correlated with that principle of liberty. There are exceptions to this erst-while rule, and it is why our own constitution explicitly avoids 50+ majoritarianism,  why our constitution is, in fact, anti-democratic. Contra our own immigration authorities, the most important right is not the “right to vote,” but rather the right to not vote – a subset of the right to self-determination. When one wishes to show support for a candidate, a free society permits them to do so. Critics of Iran must remember that even if the vote counts are 100 percent accurate, that is no excuse for the actions of the Islamic State and her hired goon squads – who are, after all, watching out for the well-being of the Iranian people. The issue is not the election results, but their aftermath – a reminder of what an unfree state really is.

Now is the time.

I’ve been almost stewing in fury at this Phelps story, unable to compose myself and put virtual pen to e-paper. Thankfully, Radley Balko summed up my thoughts for me, and I post his entire piece here, since it really needs to be read:

A Letter I’d Like To See (But Won’t)

Sunday, February 1st, 2009

Dear America,

I take it back. I don’t apologize.

Because you know what? It’s none of your goddamned business. I work my ass off 10 months per year. It’s that hard work that gave you all those gooey feelings of patriotism last summer. If during my brief window of down time I want to relax, enjoy myself, and partake of a substance that’s a hell of a lot less bad for me than alcohol, tobacco, or, frankly, most of the prescription drugs most of you are taking, well, you can spare me the lecture.

I put myself through hell. I make my body do things nature never really intended us to endure. All world-class athletes do. We do it because you love to watch us push ourselves as far as we can possibly go. Some of us get hurt. Sometimes permanently. You’re watching the Super Bowl tonight. You’re watching 300 pound men smash each while running at full speed, in full pads. You know what the average life expectancy of an NFL player is? Fifty-five. That’s about 20 years shorter than your average non-NFL player. Yet you watch. And cheer. And you jump up spill your beer when a linebacker lays out a wide receiver on a crossing route across the middle. The harder he gets hit, the louder and more enthusiastically you scream.

Yet you all get bent out of shape when Ricky Williams, or I, or Josh Howard smoke a little dope to relax. Why? Because the idiots you’ve elected to make your laws have have without a shred of evidence beat it into your head that smoking marijuana is something akin to drinking antifreeze, and done only by dirty hippies and sex offenders.

You’ll have to pardon my cynicism. But I call bullshit. You don’t give a damn about my health. You just get a voyeuristic thrill from watching an elite athlete fall from grace–all the better if you get to exercise a little moral righteousness in the process. And it’s hypocritical righteousness at that, given that 40 percent of you have tried pot at least once in your lives.

Here’s a crazy thought: If I can smoke a little dope and go on to win 14 Olympic gold medals, maybe pot smokers aren’t doomed to lives of couch surfing and video games, as our moronic government would have us believe. In fact, the list of successful pot smokers includes not just world class athletes like me, Howard, Williams, and others, it includes Nobel Prize winners, Pulitzer Prize winners, the last three U.S. presidents, several Supreme Court justices, and luminaries and success stories from all sectors of business and the arts, sciences, and humanities.

So go ahead. Ban me from the next Olympics. Yank my endorsement deals. Stick your collective noses in the air and get all indignant on me. While you’re at it, keep arresting cancer and AIDS patients who dare to smoke the stuff because it deadens their pain, or enables them to eat. Keep sending in goon squads to kick down doors and shoot little old ladies, maim innocent toddlers, handcuff elderly post-polio patients to their beds at gunpoint, and slaughter the family pet.

Tell you what. I’ll make you a deal. I’ll apologize for smoking pot when every politician who ever did drugs and then voted to uphold or strengthen the drug laws marches his ass off to the nearest federal prison to serve out the sentence he wants to impose on everyone else for committing the same crimes he committed. I’ll apologize when the sons, daughters, and nephews of powerful politicians who get caught possessing or dealing drugs in the frat house or prep school get the same treatment as the no-name, probably black kid caught on the corner or the front stoop doing the same thing.

Until then, I for one will have none of it. I smoked pot. I liked it. I’ll probably do it again. I refuse to apologize for it, because by apologizing I help perpetuate this stupid lie, this idea that what someone puts into his own body on his own time is any of the government’s damned business. Or any of yours. I’m not going to bend over and allow myself to be propaganda for this wasteful, ridiculous, immoral war.

Go ahead and tear me down if you like. But let’s see you rationalize in your next lame ONDCP commercial how the greatest motherfucking swimmer the world has ever seen . . . is also a proud pot smoker.

Yours,

Michael Phelps

Letting this story simply die is not enough. Now, more than ever, organizations and individuals who care deeply about individual liberty and rational policy-making need to make themselves loud and clear. The last three presidents have all admitted, in coy political fashion, to using the drug. Arguably the nation’s top athlete currently uses the substance. The man who is singularly responsible for one the world’s most powerful computing companies, Apple, has described his LSD use as “one of the two or three most important things [he had] done in [his] life.”

The charade continues, as it appears that the police plan on pursuing the case. I can’t get to mad about the police, because it’s easy to divine his motives: more press coverage means more funds from the city and state government, as well as federal funding from the DEA, if he plays his cards right (thanks, veep!). What is infuriating are the governmental incentives that allow for this sort of nannying to be condoned and rewarded with grant money.

Now, more than ever, NORML et al must get serious. Buy some national ad time, and expose this idiocy for what it is.